Something that keeps like interesting. Keeps you guessing.
Life is an adventure. Within everyday is a new challenge we must learn to face and cope with. todays adventure consisted of learning how to cope with the fact that i have these insane trust issues... someone gets close to me, i pull away. almost instinctive.
but i talked about it with them. actually told them what was wrong. actually made an effort to fix it.
this is new for me. and a huge step in a glorious direction.
working through issues. it's funny how the more i get to know someone, and they get to know me, i learn how completely screwed up i can be. they're surprised and so am i.
oh, and roadtrip in five days. can i get any more excited than i currently am? donovans driving me to the airport on the first. please let it snow. so incredibly much that i must stay. all year.
ahha. i become extremely spastic when i see people i haven't in a while. jumping on top of people is not uncommon. why do i have to live in texas? im in a place i dont want to be 360 days of the year, && in a place i want to be in desperately.. in an environment that i neeeed desperately five days. five.
cruel joke. maybe this is all just preparation for the rest of my life.
kind of a depressing thought. a futile season of life.
emo.
oh well. today was a swell introvert day (: skyped with the twins, jesse, and donovan. & landon and caleb are going to kc too! shall be swell. found out landon is nineteen.. awkward moment when i told him i was fifteen. ahaha. jackson prite flashbacks.
i should be much happier than i am. but theres something missing. i can't place it, but it's unmistakable.
i need an adventure. a new adventure. i want to see the world. i wanna drink coffee and read all day in some coffeehouse in europe. backpacking the day i graduate.
i've been listening to Perfect Morning - Orba Squara all day. on repeat. (music always gets me).
well its 2 something and im exhausted. goodnight. i could continue ranting but i feel completely lethargic. ont une meilleure nuit que je suis <3